A Life Changing Decision 23 Years Ago

Graduation from Cottey College, 2005

 

When asked to host an exchange student from Uzbekistan for the 2002-2003 school year, we scrambled to find the country on a map. (It is one of the ‘Stans,’ north of Afghanistan and south of Kazakhstan in Central Asia).

We said “yes,” forever changing our lives the moment 17-year-old Feruza Esanova stepped off the plane. It changed hers, too.  

23 years later

Fast forward to 23 years later, we found ourselves dancing our hearts out at her wedding ceremonies in Uzbekistan and later exploring the subways of Tashkent and three ancient cities along the Silk Road. Who would have guessed? We certainly now know where Uzbekistan is and much more.

We helped Feruza get a student visa and a scholarship to Cottey College in Nevada MO. She later became a nurse, got a green card, became a US citizen, got a Master of Public Health Administration, manages a large surgery center, recently became a Nurse Practitioner of Psychiatry, and married Kaveh Kashkooli at a civil ceremony in New York.

The Wedding Ceremonies

Feruza and Kaveh at the Uzbek ceremony

An Uzbek wedding—what an unforgettable and emotional experience! Lots of dancing, music, food, vodka, and joy. The ceremonies began in her hometown of Navoi, about 289 miles west of Tashkent, with an official morning ceremony attended by about  50 guests.  That evening we attended a huge evening dinner and celebration for about 400 guests. Besides Kathy, Skyler, and my brothers Mark and Neal, a delegation of Americans flew here, including some of her co-workers, and PEO members. (PEO awarded her scholarships to attend Cottey College and Drexel University).

We were moved by the rich pageantry, apparel, music, food, and dancing, often to Bollywood-sounding tunes.

Then the whole delegation of American guests and Feruza’s family rode back to Tashkent in a hired “party bus”.  The 8 hour bus ride was a different view of rural Uzbekistan, and for most of us who partied hard the night before, a nice quiet time to rest and recharge.  

Symbolic items at the Persian ceremony

We got an equal—but different— experience for the Persian ceremony in Tashkent. The private event at the Hilton rooftop garden was serene, beautiful, and full of symbolism. The culminating event was a five-hour dinner and festivities at a big wedding hall for about 200 that evening. It just blew us (and our eardrums) away. Dancing, dancers, singers, a live band, a DJ, and everyone dressed up to the max. All we can say, is “Wow!” As I danced with the beautiful and confident bride, I got very emotional remembering a shy and scared 17-year-old exchange student fresh off the plane, and how far she has come in the past 23 years. Kathy and I were honored to be included in most of the parent photos. (Her father died in 2006). The whole thing was an emotional once-in-a-lifetime experience we will never forget.

Tashkent

View of City Park from the Hilton rooftop

Uzbekistan gained its independence in 1991 with the collapse of the Soviet Union. But much of the country—especially Tashkent, the capital—still has a Russian feel to it. In Tashkent Russian was heard more than Uzbek. Struggling worker and heroic monuments exist everywhere. On a free day, my brothers and I got on the 1970s era subway for 13 cents and stopped often to marvel at the murals and artwork. A university student befriended us and pointed out the stations with the best murals.

Subway art. More photos in link below

Our modern BnB was across from a giant park, which is Tashkent’s living room, especially in the evening. It was a fun mix of water/light shows, gelato vendors, children’s rides, and more. Nearby modern buildings put on their own light shows, some shamelessly promoting, consumer products.

Tashkent City Park at night.

The Stunning Silk Road

After four days of wedding ceremonies, we explored three Silk Road cities of Khiva, Bukhara, and Samarkand, often listening to Jack Weathers’ engrossing Genghis Khan, and the Making of the Modern World along the way. Over 3,000 years old and at the crossroads of ancient civilizations, they were beautiful beyond measure, especially Samarkand. They were also hot, as in 104 F in the modern parts, and much more inside the mostly treeless walled cities of brick and stone.

Much of Bhukara was bombed by the Bolsheviks in 1920 to dispose

Inside the lavish palace of the Amir in Bukhara

of a powerful Amir—the last direct descendent of Genghis Khan-and divide his kingdom into separate states of Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan, and Tajikistan. (Kind of what Churchill did to the Otterman Empire in the Middle East after WWI, minus the bombing.) But what remains is still spectacular, especially the Amir’s former place. It was the only city Genghis had ever personally entered, and its mosque was the only building he ever entered.

Khiva. More photos in link below